It’s been 9 months since I became a full time working momma. It’s been 9 months since I became the “bread winner” of our family. It’s been 9 months of trying to juggle
- My family
- My work
- My house
- My yard
- My social life
- My finances
- My sanity
That’s a lot of balls to juggle. Most of the time I’ve dropped a few at a time, other times I’m dropping at least one and small amounts of time for very brief moments I have them all in the air and it’s a beautiful balance. Of course the goal is to continue the beautiful balance, but the reality is that it takes a lot of practice to be able to juggle 7 balls. It starts by juggling a couple balls, and gradually increasing the amount until you can keep them going for extended amounts of time.
I want that, I long for that, and I continue to practice daily. What I also try to be cognizant of, is the fact that sometimes it’s just not possible, and sometimes a ball has to drop – and that is ok.
After 9 months I think I’ve become pretty good at juggling 3-4 balls at a time. Family, work, and the house are the main three, and I’m at a point where it’s almost easy to juggle those three. It took a lot of focus, a lot of patience, and a lot of working out what was the most important things to me with each of those balls. When it comes to my family, I know that I will not be able to spend as much time as I would really like with them, so the little time I do have I make sure that I’m completely 100% there. That means, very little house work, no TV and as little phone as possible. It means giving Ezekiel my full attention, doing activities that he is going to enjoy even if I don’t. It means staying up a little bit later to be with my husband.
When it comes to work, I need to be there, do the best I can do and to excel. That means when I’m at work I do my best to be completely there and not distracted by the other things going on in life. It really helps that I LOVE who I work with and I LOVE being at work. I am passionate about what I do and so working is an easy thing for me to do.
When it comes to my house my priority continues to be to keep a clean, tidy, peaceful and beautiful home. This means that I have to find the time each week to do a good cleaning. It means taking a few extra minutes a day to tidy up around the house so that at the end of the week I’m not overwhelmed with what I have to do. I’ve started cleaning on Friday nights and the last month or so it’s really worked out well. It doesn’t take all that long to do and then the bulk of it is done so I can spend my Saturday with Ezekiel.
The yard is my second baby right now. Of course I love to be outside in the garden admiring the growth, but I’m not always great at getting the lawn cut and having it perfectly manicured. I’m realizing that our yard will take us a long time to get to where we are truly 100% happy with it. We’ll continue to make little changes each year as we have time and can afford to. My husband has just as big of ambitions as I do when it comes to the yard and landscaping so I know he’ll help out a lot. The nice thing about living in Canada is the fact that yard work really only lasts half the year and then you get a break.
My social life is severely lacking right now, and it’s the ball that I willingly drop to let all the other balls continue to be up in the air. It sucks. A.LOT. Having only one day out of the week off and a husband who takes evening classes makes it near to impossible to spend any time with my friends. I try to stay connected and put in effort via text messages etc, but even that I’m not great at. This is the area that I feel I lack the most in. Most days I feel like the worlds worst friend, yet I know my friends also have busy work schedules and family life, so they are typically in the same boat as me. It’s the crappy part of growing up I suppose.
My finances are always difficult – being a one income household, but I’m fairly happy with how I manage them. There’s always room for improvement, but only so much you can do! Learning to live within our means and understanding where to make the sacrifices is helpful, and like everyone in the world sometimes I make foolish decisions!
Lastly, my sanity! This past week I’ve realized so many things about what I need to do to keep my sanity. I think I’ll start a mini series on how I keep my sanity working 6 days a week and 55 hours in that week. I know I’m not the only one out there working hard to keep their family fed, clothed, and sheltered. It’s a big job and a big responsibility and when it falls to the wife/mom to do it’s often a lot bigger of a job than if it was the husband (forgive this generalization!). Women tend to be more aware of the household rather than just working to pay the bills. We work to pay the bills then work to keep the house, then work to keep the yard etc.
Life is an ebb and flow of motion and I’m so grateful to be here to enjoy the ride.